Giving and Receiving Constructive Criticism…

Giving and Receiving Constructive Criticism....


Ok so we have all taken criticism before me more then others lol but it what we do with that criticism that defines you as a person… say for instance (and im using singing as an example because it the most common criticism) your best mate is absolutely tone deaf ( I am not referring to any of my mates btw) and he cant sing at all… would it better if you don’t tell him that he sucks at singing or encourage him to sing more so you don’t hurt his feelings… now this goes on and on and on until one day he says to you that he is going on Australian idol so he can have a chance to share his gift with the hole of Australia? (ur thinking ohhh SHIT) but you don’t say anything because you don’t want to hurt his feelings … now he goes on the show sings … the judges are on the floor screaming “GOD LET IT STOP” covering there ears from noise your mate is producing from his voice….. now would it be better for him to embarrass him self in front of his mates or the entire country and maybe even get posted on youtube and you end up like this dude http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OATgxZzpxrY .


I mean this dude obviously never got told by his mates he couldn’t sing… So my question to you.. would it be better to tell someone straight up even if you don’t have the courage to tell that person he isn’t that good … do not say “YOU SUCK JUST STOP SINGING YOUR MAKING BABY JESUS CRY!” uh…that would be a no that would probably stop him from singing yes mission completed but that’s not what a mate should say. Say something like “ok yeah I thought that was ok but I wouldn’t make a career of it..” say something that is sugar coated and if they don’t get it then refer to my previous line of “your making baby Jesus cry”… no jokes don’t do that… if he doesn’t get the picture then you have done all you can do as a friend and if they get a kick in the gut from someone else then you can say to him well I tried to warn you. In any situation when you’re constructively criticizing someone… say it tactfully and nicely not screaming at them saying they suck.

When you receive constructive criticism try not to take it personally I have taken things before when some of my mates warned me and taken it personally and thought they hated me….But the truth of the matter is that they were just looking out for me…because that way you learn and you obviously go out and make what you just did better…I got a beating when I played cricket from one of my coaches Scotty he would really crack it at me but I was to immature to recognize that what he was doing was for a reason and not that he had something against me…and it’s unfortunate that I didn’t pick up on it then instead of now…this is what I always say Learn from your mistakes which has taken me 21 years to understand lol…so just because someone says your not good or no that could be better they are not saying to beat you down they are saying so you can either improve on that area or just quit while your ahead lol I know that sounds mean but…I tell you what it’s a cruel world and if your family members or friends don’t tell you before you recognize it, when you go out into that scary world then your just going to get a harder beating and your going to look for someone to blame.. “open your ears, listen, ask for constructive criticism because it’s not harmful it’s either telling you two things

1. that you need to improve on that area
2. that you need to stop before you make a full of yourself

Peace
Haydos

"Forgive & Forget"

Can we really forgive and forget? Well the oxford dictionary defines forgiving as an act of ceasing any angry or resentful feelings toward a person. The meaning for forgetting is cease to think off.

For me when I forgive a person I usually don’t forget I don’t know if it’s the same for anyone else but for me the forgiving part is always the easiest. Does this mean if I don’t forget then I don’t forgive?

My mum has told me before “I will forgive you but I am never going to forget…”
Which makes more sense to me then anything.
She has also said “I broughta u ina this world illa take you out!” which also makes a lot of sense to me… though she says it in a aussie way…. and yet for some reason it still sends shivers up my spine because when she says it all I can see is the soprano’s or something like that… I’m actually scared if I wake up there is going to be a horses head next to me….. anyways that’s of topic.. now I have never heard ill forget but I wont forgive…so is the term “forgive and forget” over used

Me personally yes I do think that term is over used it means nothing…if something has majorly happened to you then you will never forget unless u take some drugs or you got long term and short term memory loss or the person hits u over the head and u get memory loss in which case then that term could be used. But in natural fact u will never forget and revisiting those memories can really hurt.

I am not arguing the fact that you can not forgive a person but can u really forget about it. Like maybe in situation like when u were younger.. when your older bro steals a porno and says to you I wont tell mum about this ill just throw it out for you, your thinking wow what a great brother THEN untill u find it under his bed years later… those sought of scenarios yes could actually forget about it because it is not major…

The thing is….people should always forgive someone…..It may take time but people do things that sometime you may not understand…and sometime people do things that they know full well what there doing and yes it could be unforgivable….but as humans we are not perfect….

I am sure if someone has sincerely apologized for something then they have made the first step to emending what they have done wrong then your next step is to forgive that person it may take time …. Yes but it’s a way of healing yourself because you have accepted what that person did they have apologized the next step for you to feel better is to forgive them….even though sometimes you may not want to forgive that person because your looking to blame someone but I am sure if the roles were reversed you would want that person to accept your apology..

If you have any thoughts on this matter, then leave a comment and if it has actually helped someone then no worries

Peace

Haydos

P.S remember when you are ready to forgive someone ... that's when you are ready to move on.

The Pursuit Of happIness

first of all I Dig That Movie....

Now I have thought of a couple of things what is the pursuit of happiness? well we know its on the American declaration Of Independence . But to pursue happiness we would have to be depressed in the first place or we wouldn’t be pursuing something we don’t have… think about it…

The other question is what you think will make you happy…some people its wealth…some its love….for me well its something different.

For example we got little Timmy here wanting a new race car for Christmas from Santa. Now if he receives that present…then he will be HAPPY … BUT if he doesn’t receive the brand new race car then he will be upset….


Another scenario a little gurl in a 3rd world country you wouldn’t think she would be happy would you but it’s the little things for them that makes them happy like maybe eating every day or getting clean water OR GOING TO SCHOOL OMG which most of us and including my self have taken for granted or made us unhappy

And my last scenario is:
What about the down syndrom people they're humans but we look at them and feel sorry for them….because we are thinking there not happy and why has god done this to them blah blah blah …… but have you heard the saying “ignorance is bliss”
The reason why I’m saying this is because EVERY and I mean EVERY single time I see those type of people they are always smiling being happy and just enjoying life in general the only time they aren’t is when people are putting them down (so maybe its us who are missing a few ingredients) ….who are people to think they are better then someone who’s got down syndrome or things like that…..(the thing is it should be other way around they should be looking at us and feel sorry because u know what we are not always happy most of the time we are selfish inconsiderate rude bored and ungrateful for what we have.,… so most of the time we aren’t happy) now I’m guilty of this but I’m not perfect I am human but just thinking about this has made me realize. ( i DARE EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO READS THIS TAKE MY CHALLENGE open your eyes you can start by going to this and try and now find a peson with down syndrom not smiling..... Amuse me plz)http://images.google.com.au/images?sourceid=navclient&ie=UTF-8&rlz=1T4SUNA_enAU306AU306&q=down%20syndrome&um=1&sa=N&tab=wi

so maybe instead of “pursuing happiness” maybe we should pursue greatfullness be greatfull for what you have be thankfull that your not in a worst postion then what you are already in and if u want to better your postion go after it but never compain and not to do anything about it....this inspiring story is not just about being happy but what you have to do to make you happy and being greatfull that ur not in a worst position then what you could be in because nothing comes from complaing about something and not doing something about it.....

Cheers for reading

Peace
Haydos